I recently read a post about love http://queenautumnlee.wordpress.com/2008/03/16/love-or-loneliness/ ; for some reason, it caught my eye, I was quite interested to read what this person had to say about it. She was in fact quite honest about her feelings, asking herself what her real motivations were behind the fact she wanted to get married. Made me feel like to respond tit for tat (smth I never do when I don’t know sb):
So many people actually get into a relationship because of one of the motivations you listed (money, desire not to be lonely, good job of the spouse…) although they wouldn’t recognize it for themselves. Being not married, I don’t know all the tips to find love… at least in this area ;) But I have understood that, when you build a relationship based on instrumentalizing the other, using him to fulfill smth in you, it’s a wrong start. Only God knows truly how to fill the holes that we all have in us because He made us with these needs.
I think love involves both feelings and will, which makes it so strong…. But I think love is smth beyond emotions. It’s the choice to open up to sb, let him enter in your heart, and give yourself to him. It’s scary, makes you vulnerable and involves a lot of trust… But if you don’t open up, then you will spend your life behind your walls… You think you’re protected, but in fact you’re lonely. Now, the issue is to find the person trustworthy enough for you to let him come close.
Yeah, maybe I could begin by opening half the door… then a little more… and a little more… see if the person is faithful with what I entrust him/her with… and then…
But again, there is no recipe for love nor relationship… (Remind me not to categorize this under “recipes”😉 I would not trust my own abilities really, and I’ve become more and more aware of how much I’m dependant on God’s wisdom.
What do you think?
Now, once this piece of wisdom out and my conscience at peace, I’d rather laugh about it all.