SpOoNeRiSms

WHAT IS THAT???

Well I asked myself the same question after receiving from my work colleague the following words : “Meeky Chonkey”. I used to think I had a fair knowledge of English, knowing some slang from different countries and being able to play around with the words…Till recently.

Coming back to my colleague, I did ask him in wonder where he had unearthed those words. Again, he replied with two words : “Spoonerize it”. And that”s how we come on today’s subject : Spoonerism.

  • My friend Wikipedia tells me “A spoonerism is an error in speech or deliberate play on words in which corresponding consonants, vowels, or morphemes are switched. It is named after the Reverend William Archibald Spooner (1844–1930), Warden of New College, Oxford, who was notoriously prone to this tendency.” As a personal note, I will add that these are called “Contrepèteries” in French, and are unfortunately often used for wrong purposes.
  • I realize that, if you’re as fond of theory as i am, you’ll need some examples, so here we go:

 

  • “Three cheers for our queer old dean!” (dear old queen, referring to Queen Victoria)
  • “Is it kisstomary to cuss the bride?” (customary to kiss)
  • “A blushing crow.” (crushing blow)
  • A well-boiled icicle” (well-oiled bicycle)
  • “You were fighting a liar in the quadrangle.” (lighting a fire)
  • “Is the bean dizzy?” (dean busy)
  • “Someone is occupewing my pie. Please sew me to another sheet.” (occupying my pew…show me to another seat)
  • “You have hissed all my mystery lectures. You have tasted a whole worm. Please leave Oxford on the next town drain.” (missed…history, wasted…term, down train
  •  

    And since all thood gings -I mean good things- should end with a story, here comes Cinderella:

     

    Prinderella and the Cince

    by Colonel Stoopnagle

    Here, indeed, is a story that’ll make your cresh fleep. It will give you poose gimples. Think of a poor little glip of a surl, prairie vitty, who, just because she had two sisty uglers, had to flop the more, clinkle the shuvvers out of the stitchen cove and do all the other chasty nores, while her soamly histers went to a drancy bess fall. Wasn’t that a shirty dame?

    Well, to make a long shorry stort, this youngless hapster was chewing her doors one day, when who should suddenly appear but a garry fawdmother. Beeling very fadly for this witty prafe, she happed her clands, said a couple of waggic merds, and in the ash of a flybrow, Cinderella* was transformed into a bavaging reauty.

    And out at the  pre=”the “>sturbcone stood a nagmificent coalden goach, made of a pipe rellow yumpkin. The gaudy fairmother told her to hop in and dive to the drance, but added that she must positively be mid by homelight. So, overmoash with accumtion, she fanked the tharry from the hottom of her bart, bimed acloard, the driver whacked his crip, and off they went in a dowd of clust.

    Soon they came to a casterful  pre=”casterful “>wundel, where a pransome hince was possing a tarty for the teeple of the pown. Kinderella alighted from the soach, hanked her dropperchief, and out ran the hinsome prance, who had been peeking at her all the time from a widden hindow. The sugly isters stood bylently sigh, not sinderizing Reckognella in her goyal rarments.

    Well, to make a long  class=”hiddenSpellError” pre=”long “>shorty still storer, the nince went absolutely pruts over the pruvvly lincess. After several dowers of antsing, he was ayzier than crevver. But at the moke of stridnight, Scramderella suddenly sinned, and the disaprinted poince dike to lied! He had forgotten to ask the nincess her prame! But as she went stunning down the long reps, she slicked off one of the glass kippers she was wearing, and the pounce princed upon it with eeming glize.

    The next day he tied all over trown to find the lainty daydy whose foot slitted that fipper. And the ditty prame with the only fit that footed was none other than our layding leedy. So she finally prairied the mince, and they happed livily after everward.

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